I really don’t like hearing  of bad news. Especially when it hits home and unfortunately I feel like that’s all I ever hear anymore. As I have said before in some of my other posts, I had a lot of people reach out to me with their own fertility struggles or losses. Some are strangers, some were acquaintances and some were close friends. Whether I planned on it or not, I immediately had a special bond with all of these women and I cherish this so much. I continue to follow their journeys and cheer them on.

Sadly, no matter how much you root  for someone their story may not have a happy ending and that is really hard for me to accept. 

A little update on my friend who was diagnosed with cancer- She  had surgery last week and had most of her cervix removed. This may not seem like this is  big deal especially if she is going to be okay, but she was also planning on having another child right before she found out this awful news. Her cancer is also a very rare and she is being sent to Chapel Hill to see a specialist.With most of her cervix being gone( and the possibility of having to have a hysterectomy in her future)her doctor has told her it will be pretty hard for her to get pregnant, much less even be able to carry a baby, so more than likely her pregnancies would end in miscarriage.  Although she already has a son, this is extremely sad news for her and her husband not to mention the C word haunting her everyday and not knowing what her future holds.

This week, I found out one of my customers from La Plage who I still keep in touch with, delivered her baby boy and he came out not breathing(I am not sure of the full details yet) and passed away 5 days later. This news took my breath away, I immediately got teary eyed and had goosebumps and I can’t shake this feeling of sadness. I know all of the emotions that I went through and how much my miscarriage has effected me as well as changed my life. But being over 9 months pregnant, going into the hospital thinking you will be coming home with your miracle only for things to go horribly wrong and leaving that hospital empty-handed is unbearable for me to think about. I feel as though my pain and grief is minimal compared to what she is going through and I just want to hug her and take away her pain. Every successful birth is TRULY a miracle and nothing is EVER promised to us.

Then there is Kristen and Jamie, two cousins who have come together to create a sweet baby boy. I have talked about their journey in previous posts. Kristen is currently being a surrogate for her cousin Jamie and she is due any day now. I pray that everything goes smoothly with the delivery!  Please check out their stories, you wont be sorry!

I am still anxiously waiting to hear news from my friends who are currently going through or getting ready to go through IUI/IVF. I pray for good news as they all truly deserve tiny miracles of their own.

“Your encouragement may be the only good thing someone receives. Be aware of who God puts in your path. Nobody is there by accident.” Joel Osteen

This quote makes SO much sense to me now. All of the women who I talked bout above were definitely put in my life for a reason. Some of them I have been close with when I was younger and recently reconnected with,  or maybe they are just a friend of  a friend, as well as my customer from La Plage, what made her different from all my other customers? why did we decide to keep in touch?   It really makes it clear to me that all of these women were put into my life for a reason and I am so thankful for them all. 

 Everytime I hear of bad news I found my self asking….Why me? Or why her?  WHY US!!???

and then I came across this…


Are we the chosen ones? Has everything in our lives thus far prepared us for this unique journey to motherhood? I think so. I am so proud of myself and proud of all of them. Although I can only speak for myself, I know there is something special in me that allows me to continue on with my life and keep pushing forward no matter what happens.

Just when I think I can’t, I do.

I’m pretty sure one word can explain why this is possible. FAITH.

So here’s to my fellow soldiers, lets keep marching on.

Until Next Time…




One thought on “Soldiers

  1. How ironic!! I obviously didn’t see this because I WAS having a baby haha. I read the title and it caught me that was your title since we lost a pilot that day too. There’s always irony!

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